The Automated Crab Dispenser

by isised | August 21, 2011

 

  1. Anger Release Machine – A piece of fine china falls from the slot and breaks at the bottom of the machine, apparently relieving stress.
  2. Marijuana – Where? California, of course. The marijuana is for medical use and surrounded by armed guards. Rumour has it that sales in nearby chocolate machines have tripled since these were installed.
  3. Canned Bread – It’s as simple and delicious as it sounds.
  4. Live hairy crabs – You can buy these from a vending machine in Nanjing, China. The machine keeps the local delicacies at 41 degrees Fahrenheit; cool enough to make the crabs sleepy without killing them. If you do purchase a dead crab, the company behind the vending machine will compensate you with three live ones.
  5. Judaism Vending Machine – For those who like their faith on-the-go, there’s a vending machine in a bus station in central Jerusalem which dispenses Judeo educational material.
  6. Underwear – Pre-worn schoolgirls’ underwear is available from strategically placed vending machines in Japan. These were made illegal in 1993 but probably not for the reasons that might spring to mind; the operation was shut down by concerned antiques dealers invoking a law stating that anybody selling second hand items first needs permission from local authorities.
Image: Llee Wu